How to Prepare For a First Date

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Embrace those Butterflies – First Dates Should Be Fun, Not Stressful!

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Preparing for a first date can be both exciting and nerve-wracking. Who doesn’t love a little adrenaline? Try to stay relaxed, positive, and open-minded. Don’t spend time playing out each scenario imagining an unhappy ending. Instead reframe it as an adventure and an experience that could add to your life story.  A first date should be fun, not a chore, and not something you dread. Both the prep, planning and the hopes for a future love should keep the momentum going. However, many of us  get caught up in what I call the "date dreads." What if I'm not attracted to them? What if I'm bored? What if they chew too loudly, complain about their ex, snort when they laugh, or turn out to be a narcissist? It is difficult not to overthink and worry, but I recommend switching the narrative!  

Let’s get curious, and open. The idea of meeting a new person can not only be interesting and sometimes intoxicating, but can also lead to a new work opportunity, a date for a friend, or maybe even lead you to your soul mate. You just never know. When you have a first date planned, use it as an excuse to do something nice for yourself. Buy something new to wear, and approach the date with a fresh attitude. Be open to the possibilities and enjoy the journey of finding love.

Here are some tips to make you feel ready:

Plan ahead: Choose a place or activity you both enjoy.

Choose a location that is convenient and enjoyable for both of you. Whether it's a cozy coffee shop or a fun activity, make sure it's a place where you can relax and be yourself.

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Dress confidently & comfortably to showcase your authentic self.

Use it as an excuse to do something nice for yourself. Buy something new to wear, create a positive experience, and approach the date with a fresh attitude. Be open to the possibilities and enjoy the journey of finding love.

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Arrive on time to set a positive tone.

Being late can make your date feel like you don’t respect their time and value the opportunity of getting to know them. It’s no surprise that 75% of people find it irritating when their date is late. So take whatever measures are necessary in your planning to make sure you show up on time. Unexpected circumstances arise, so if you do find yourself running behind, make sure to let your date know as soon as possible.

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Be yourself - authenticity is key!

Authenticity is attractive, as is someone who has opinions. That does not mean being adversarial, but it’s great to voice a different perspective if you have one. It shows confidence. Raise topics that you are passionate about to let your personality shine through, allowing your date to get to know the real you, even if it takes a bit of vulnerability.

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Keep the conversation flowing with open-ended questions.

Actively listen and show interest in what your date is saying by asking questions that you’re genuinely curious about and responding thoughtfully and authentically. Make sure you're not dominating the conversation, as monopolizing the dialogue is frequently cited as a common complaint among daters. Don’t treat the date as you would a job interview –this is just an opportunity to enjoy someone’s company and get to know a bit about them, as well as to share a little about yourself. A deeper, balanced conversation helps build connection and shows that you are interested in getting to know your date.

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Steer clear of heavy topics like politics and religion.

Even if they're important to you, these topics can add stress or tension to an otherwise successful date.

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Stay Positive

‍Keep an open mind and a positive attitude. Focus on getting to know the other person and enjoying the experience, rather than worrying about the outcome.

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Be Present

Engage in the conversation, ask questions, and show genuine interest in getting to know them. Constantly texting or checking your phone is the most off-putting dating behavior universally reported among men and women. Unless it's an emergency, keep your phone out of sight and focus on the person you're with. If it’s absolutely necessary for you to attend to something on your phone, be apologetic and keep it brief.
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Have Realistic Expectations

Remember, it's just a first date. It doesn't have to be perfect, and you don't have to find "the one" right away. Enjoy the moment and see where it leads.

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Follow Up‍

If you enjoyed the date, don't be afraid to follow up and express your interest. A simple text thanking them for the good time can go a long way.

Make your first date a memorable experience filled with positivity and connection. By following these tips and embracing a positive mindset, you can transform the first date experience from nerve-wracking to exciting and enjoyable. Happy dating!

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Article by After Hello Matchmaker JoJo